As we walk on our personal journey called Life; we often end up spending more time course correcting, than actually walking on the chosen path. At least that’s how most people feel. So often, when we set our focus on a long term goal like marriage, having children or having a dream job, we find ourselves lost in the maze of life, being diverted by first one setback, and then another, only to arrive right back where westarted. Have you ever wondered if this zig zag path is in fact part of the journey?
“As we sailed, I noticed that no matter how much each of us tried to keep perfectly
on course, we drifted. To get to where we are going then became about the constant
cycling between being off course and getting back on. Between drift and non-drift” –
We often find ourselves questioning the way things turned out VS how we wanted/planned for them to turn out. Often time’s people are filled with the feeling of regret over things that might have been a certain way had we done or said certainthings. Some examples are – Regret for quitting a well-paying job ; Regret for hurting someone we love ; Regret for not taking action when we had a chance.The fact is asking “What if” and wondering “If only” are statements that have never worked as a time machine for changing history. (If only they had!!). It’s time to stop spending so much time feeling bad about the past.
Here’s 3 things you need to do in order to step away from the distractions and stay focused on your course to creating a life you dream and deserve.
- Staying focused on the end game
By staying focused on the bigger picture, we can keep going no matter what happens and no matter how long it takes. Usually one of two things happen to people – either they never want to leave the comfort zone or they never take time to comfort themselves. Let’s understand with the example of going climbing. While climbing to the top of the summit, you often have to first go down the valley. Once there you can enjoy the gentle stream and the plentiful vegetation. Some love it there so much that they decide they never want to leave. What happens when the season changes? Or when more people enter the valley with you and it gets too crowded. Well then we blame the whole world for spoiling our little piece of paradise. And we have forgotten that this was only a temporary stop, the summit is still waiting for us.
On the contrary, what if you reach the valley and even though it’s awesome, you are so focused on reaching the top, you don’t take time to rest. You just keep on going. You miss on all the fun and pretty soon you are too exhausted to go on. So rather than settling for less or getting discouraged by setbacks, it’s important that you become the kind of person who can appreciate the journey and stay focused on the end game.
- It’s all part of the plan – ALL OF IT
Even when you think you are lost, you are not. If life was going to be one straight road, it would be pretty boring. We sometimes take a well informed decision and plan for the best outcome. When things don’t turn out as planned, we blame ourselves or our environment and regret the decision. Regret is pretty pointless in that respect. Instead if we can focus on the present and learn from it, and trust that this too has meaning, we will without a doubt move on to the next level of the game called life. Having an anchor in our life in the form of a motivational relationship or a life coach can greatly help us understand and appreciate the drifts in our life.
- Seeking Daily Motivation
Motivation does not last for long. Just like we need to bathe every day so we can stay clean, we need to learn to motivate ourselves every day so we can stay focused. Even if one were to read all the self-help books available in the world today, one would still not be able to get rid of all the negative emotions. Having positive and negative emotions are the ethos of being human, so no one can escape this roller coaster experience. No matter what situation we are in, we can learn something from it about our weaknesses. Being aware of our weakness allows us to take positive actions towards negating them (Not removing them altogether). So learning the art of keeping yourself motivated is essential for people to become resilient.
If you feel like sharing your own experiences and struggles with me or and need any support, then write to me. Feel free to comment and share this with someone who needs it.